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Periodic table of rock and metal

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What if the whole of the Periodic Table were all rocks and metal? And what if it were created in 1987 by Jesus, he of the Roadside as a tribute to Guns ‘n Roses?

It is obviously a concept whose time has come, because there are several others around that attempt to knock out the non-metals and the non-rock:

Periodic Metal
Classic Rock Periods
Periodic Table of Rock Music
Chinese Periodic Table of Rock
Metal Chart

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