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Periodic table of rock and metal

What if the whole of the Periodic Table were all rocks and metal? And what if it were created in 1987 by Jesus, he of the Roadside as a tribute to Guns ‘n Roses?

It is obviously a concept whose time has come, because there are several others around that attempt to knock out the non-metals and the non-rock:

Periodic Metal
Classic Rock Periods
Periodic Table of Rock Music
Chinese Periodic Table of Rock
Metal Chart

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